POP, mutterings

stared back into time and space, and reflected on the things i had done, all of it was in the past, and yet, its still haunting me. Making me cautious and afraid.. hardly daring to breath, to hope for more.. when will this shadow pass?

POP for this year Sec $ year 2008/2009... mixed memories as i walk down the school corridor and met them, its been one year plus since my own POP and that day still brought back memories to me.. Glad to see that all of them have grown up well and have mature from being a scrawny young guy to world ready youth.. wish them the best of luck in their O/N level..

in class today, isa look super duper sick, ask her to take care.. lol.. No ONOW class today, super happy.. morning EC was a waste of time.. followed by my booth duty, blasted music at FC 6.. now than realize my laptop quite zai, can last two hour with max volumne.. lol..

silently,
heart pumping,
mind racing,
will it pass?

Paradox

this decision, only time will tell, if i make the right choice or the wrong choice.. for right or wrong, i decided.. now, its time to see if everything pays off.. for without a doubt, there's always nothing for us to gauge them on..


no doubt no one will understand that phrase, lol.. school ended at ten today, went to JP, than went to gym, tired like mad.. most prob 2mr not going tkd.. oh well, POP 2mr.. going back to TSS to see how the school has change.. and to see my juniors.. they did their part, now is the secondary 3s.. think i'm going to sleep early today and study more 2mr..

for what its worth,
i have decided,
do i,
make things clear?

projects, life, the biggest puzzle of all

do u ever get the feeling, that watever u are feeling, doesnt seem to be right. that indescrible nagging at the back of your head, that you are getting this all wrong, that the actions u are doing, the pace u put urself through, it all seems like a farce, like as if u will never get all these correct.. do u, do u? what goes around comes around, maybe this is wat is coming back to me now, my retribution for wat i had done..

boring day, slept my way through econs lecture, was wide awake for pacc lecture, thus could understand, ggt lecture as usual was boring, fell asleep halfway through, ended the day and attended a dialogue with the SAA officers.. seems like our club is quite organized as compared to other clubs, oh well.. went home after that, sorry ppl, mum cooked, played, did project and now i'm here typing..

its always when ur heart starts to whisper, a soft murmur in your ear, thats when u start to take notice, and begin to wonder about those things..

comprimise

see the word up there, thats the thing that most people fail to do and argue about the most.. cant be bothered to handle anything anymore, look at all those couples out there, what makes them click? what makes them settle down and know that they are meant for each other? thats the thing that most ppl will question, and when ppl start questioning, its when things happen.

suddenly, a tightness of breath, i cant breath properly, is it jus a problem thats skin deep, or something more.. i cant decide, what to choose to do?

clouds rising,
maybe sometime,
its time to clear the air,
and see how the sky is like?

rantings

screams and shouts, phone calling and raised voice, accusation running wild, hope wearing people down. I sat eating my dinner without a word, seems like, its all for naught. now, can u blame me for always going out, to go on long bus ride and mrt trips, to find that peace and solitude that i long for?

should i or should i not? yes or no? commit or don commit? whats the best choice, the correct option? is it too fast, or will this slip away one day? what must be the question that i should ask?

ignore all the above yeah, its just my rantings, anyway, went toa payoh and after searchng for sometime, finally found the shop i was looking for. but, that cause me to be late, SORRY ISA, met huiru at dover and reach class late, didnt seem like we miss anything.. itb was boring, and than went to gym, drank the protein, it taste like wat it said it will taste like? lol.. oh well, i need to take them, if not, my joints and cartilage are going to be gone.. oh well..

when u are faced with a yes or no,
will it be a yes,
or a no?
for the difference,
could potentially change a person's life..

fanciful wonderings

tired like mad, why do u only come to me now when u have ur problems, when before i had mine and u were nowhere to be found.. why do u only call me korkor now when u need help, when the one u have loved has spurn u and don wan u anymore.

Am i suppose to let go of everything, and jus take u back? am i suppose to forgive those years of loneliness, and shower u with my love and concern once more? can i do that? must i do that? what's the right decision?

is this the way the the story of life will go on. in a vicious circle and never ending hurt? as a guy, can i and will i allow that?

the truth hurts,
its only when u are lost,
than u realize,
that everything is not as it is...

School

PROJECTS:
1) ONOW
2) ITB
3) GGT/RWPS

oh no, so much things to do and so little time.. haiz. should do my best to settle everything asap.

there was once a girl who thought that she had found it. found the one that she was looking for. She felt that his the one for her, the one that would always make her day shine and her heart flutter with happiness.

She almost fainted the day that guy asked her out. Sadly, things were not meant to be, after being together for one year two months, it all ended.

That fateful day began like no others. The guy brought her out, out to shop along orchard road and to watch a movie later on. That night, after everything is done and they were on their way home, the things that the guy has been wanting to say since that morning came bursting out of him when they were alone at her house void deck.

Looking into her eyes and holding her hands, he told her, "Girl, its over.." With a puzzled expression on her face, she ask him, " what are you talking about? Whats over?" He just replied with one word as he turn and slowly step away from her, "us".

Her mind reeling, she grab for him and was gently push away. Her mind scream "this was not what she had wanted, this was not the ending she had imagined." Her fears turn into agony in her heart which translated to the tears sliding down her face as she sobbed without restrain. All she could manage was a heartfelt, "why?"

the guy answered, gently as if the tears on her face had shown him how fragile she was, "we cant be together, the feelings gone, its over". and with that sentence, he turn and walk away. walk away from their memories, from the months spent together, from the days spent together, from the hours they spent in each others company.

Each memory of their time spent together seem crystal clear now, as if they suddenly had a life of their own. it shone through her tears, and make her painfully aware of how much he had meant to her, of how much he matters to her life.

But, all she could do was stand there forlornly with the tears streaming down her face and watch as he slowly walk out of her life.



thats the girls side of the story. lol.. theres a reason as to why i suddenly post something like that.. but i would only reveal it in time to come.. oh well.. reading that make me think abt a lot of stuff again and realise that sometimes, things in life is not as they seem..